Town House or Country Mouse?

Lately, more than ever it seems, I find myself wondering what it would be like if we didn’t live in the middle of town, but rather, out on the farm. Full time.

If you’ve been a reader here for a while, you know the isn’t a new thought or coming out of nowhere. The more and more time we spend at the farm, the more we can see a life for us there. A life where the kids have more room and space to run and explore and get dirty and work hard and spend time with animals: taking care of them and learning all the life lessons that come with that. PJ grew up on a farm and always talks about how great it was for him and his overall mentality. He’s the hardest worker I know, and he’s carried what he learned on the farm with him his whole life.

So there’s the argument for moving to the farm: more space, it’s so damn beautiful out there, and it would be good for us all, individually and as a family. Done. Sold. Let’s move tomorrow.

But then…that would mean we would have to sell our house. To us, it wouldn’t make sense to own both of these properties because that would be too excessive. Who needs all of that? But if we sold our house in town, we wouldn’t be able to walk the kids to school anymore. We wouldn’t live two minutes down the road from the grocery that has everything we need. We wouldn’t be a few miles from stores and shops and restaurants and the ease and convenience of being able to run out whenever we need something and be back all within 30 minutes.

And of course, the house we live in is the house I grew up in. It has sentimental value to me and leaving it again, for what will probably be the last time, would be difficult, I’m sure of it. We put so much work into fixing our home up that I can’t imagine anyone else appreciating it or loving it as much as we do now. Of course, I know they would, but it would be hard to let it go again, even if I know deep down we can’t stay here forever (what once felt like a decently-sized house now feels tight, like the corners are closing in on us with every room we walk into). We both love our home, we just know it isn’t the long term goal.

Our entire way of life, it seems, would have to change and adapt to living further out on the farm, away from pretty much everything we know right now. The farm is in a one-light town, tiny in almost every sense of the word. And that’s part of why we love it so much! It’s quiet, secluded, private. Such a departure from our town house. But with three small kids I’m wondering: does it make sense to live that far out from everything when our lives are so busy and chaotic right now? Would moving to the farm actually make our lives harder in the long run since we’ll be driving back and forth to schools, sports, activities, shopping, etc.? Or would it be the respite we need from our busier-than-ever schedule and bring us a sense of peace and calm?

We do always feel so restored when we’re out there, like we’ve found our center. Even though there’s always so much work going out at the farm, it’s easy to relax there. Especially for PJ. He needs land, space, animals and fresh air to restore and replenish himself. I probably sound like a broken record saying it, but the farm is his happy place. And over the last year, it’s become our family’s, too.

I know nothing will get resolved by writing this post, and we won’t come to a conclusion by the end of the year, and probably not even by the end of next. Nothing is going to change anytime soon, and to be honest, I don’t know if we would want it to. We have so much going on that the thought of moving right now sounds daunting, like an impossible task we don’t have the willpower to complete. I think it just feels good to get this down on paper, er, blog, and keep it somewhere safe. We talk about this situation almost daily and never come to a conclusion. And maybe we’re not supposed to right now. And that’s okay.

In the meantime, we’ll be raising our three kids in the house I grew up in and enjoying the convenience of living in town, while appreciating the space and freedom the farm gives us, just as we always have.

Town house or country mouse?

For now, we’re both.