Taking in the Silence (and Actually Enjoying It)

Most days, if not all days, our lives are loud.

With three kids and more animals than I’m going to even attempt to count, there’s always some kind of noise ringing through the house. And to be honest, I quite like it that way. I love the sounds (good and bad) of kids doing life in our home. I love hearing our dog Meryl play with our cat Alyster and the noise she makes when he jokingly claws her in the face. I love the sound of the washing machine beeping and the way the doors creak in winter.

All of these are sounds of home and our very busy and very full lives right now. They’re comfortable, familiar and safe to me, and I relish them.

But on the way to clean my car and get the oil changed, something changed. I plugged in my phone and started looking for a song to listen to on the drive, but couldn’t find one I wanted to hear. I kept searching and searching but nothing sounded good. Not the new Adele, not the new Taylor, nothing.

And then I quickly realized, it’s not that I didn’t want to hear any of those songs, but that I didn’t want to hear any songs. Nothing sounded good to me because the thought of silence sounded so much better.

It’s rare that our house is quiet. It’s usually after the kids go to bed, but even then, there’s still the calming sound of the dishwasher running or the click-clack of our animals walking on the hardwood floors. This week PJ took the kids to Chattanooga while I was getting ready to accompany my mom to her holiday party, and the house was still. I tried to take in the silence then but I wasn’t able to. I’ve found I don’t enjoy being alone at home just yet; not for reasons of fear, but because I enjoy the dynamic of our family so much right now (even when I feel like I might go insane from all the fighting the kids are doing lately 😂).

Sometimes I forget we’re technically still new parents, and right now we’re still soaking up this time with our children while they’re young. I can’t tell you how many times a week someone tells us to enjoy these ages as much as we can, because they grow up so fast. I’m feeling that every single day lately: time is moving too quickly and they’re changing almost daily.

So I drove to the car wash and to get my oil changed with no sound whatsoever. No music. No podcast. No radio. And it was total bliss. I’ll be returning home to a house full of children and noise soon enough, but for now, I’m taking in the silence (and actually enjoying it).