Do You Know How I Love You So Much?

As I was tucking our son into bed the other night, he told me something that made my heart swell.

I was laying down with Riah and rubbing his forehead and eyes to get him ready for bed, as I always do, when he looked at me and said, “Daddy, do you know how I love you so much?” I knew immediately this was a version of a question I ask the kids every night: “Do you know how much I love you?” to which every guess they give me, I respond with, “Bigger.”

I smiled and felt my heart bursting with anticipation for what his reason was going to be.

“No, how?” I curiously asked.

“Because I did not like when you fell on the stairs before, that’s why I love you so much.”

Oh man. Riah has always been our little charmer. I felt joy in how he expressed love in his own words, saying what made sense to him and conveying his emotions in a way that fit his five year old vocabulary (which was my favorite part). Even if I didn’t know he was watching at the time, he saw earlier when I fell coming up the stairs to get bed time started and that I was in physical pain, and him letting me know he doesn’t like it when I am in pain is the most human and basic form of love I can think of.

We don’t like it when our loved ones suffer, and the words we choose to let them know don’t matter so much, just so long as they know how we feel.

And so I thanked him, kissed him on the forehead, and told him I loved him, too. He then immediately ended the conversation with, “Also I love that red Spiderman because he’s my favorite also.” So there’s that, haha.

Even late at night when I’m tired and in pain from a fall up the stairs earlier, their little brains have a way of making me smile and letting me know that, one way or another, I am loved.