Looking Forward to the Comforts of a New Season

The morning sun is pouring through the windows in our office as I sit here and sip my coffee in silence. It’s not yet hot out, but it’s scheduled to be soon. And with that, and a few other reasons, we are ready for the seasons to change.

This last month has been rocky in the McKay house. First PJ’s car accident last month, and then just a few days ago, his thumb accident (you can hear what happened in last night’s Vino & Vent), and we’re left feeling shaken and uneasy. It’s one of life’s worst feelings to see someone you love go through pain. Sometimes I hate this world for how it hurts PJ. I know that’s an immature and petty statement, but it’s how I feel right now. The feelings and trauma are still fresh and I am angry and sad and ready to not see my man filled with so much pain and uncertainty. I am ready for us all to move on to the next season of life.

That feeling started at the beach before the thumb accident actually. We bought a fall-ish candle at the store when we first got there and lit it right away. The entire cottage smelled like leaves and caramel and syrup, just sweet enough to make you wish autumn was right around the corner. I have that candle lit right now, too.

So it’s a combination of that candle (isn’t it funny how powerful scents are and how they can instantly transport you to another time and place?) and how hot it’s been outside that has us longing for cooler temperatures. We’ve done the pool. We’ve done the beach. We’ve done the 95 degree weather for months now. Every year around this time, after the sun and the heat and the long days where it doesn’t get dark until 9pm, I begin to crave fall. I am so ready for more delicious candles and to see warm pops of orange, brown, and yellow on the trees.

At the same time, a change of season also means the passing of time. I know we’re supposed to experience every moment and emotion, even the hard ones in order to have a whole life, but I am ready to fast forward just a little so all these awful moments of the last month are behind us. Of course there were many happy memories made, too, like boating on the river with family and friends, hosting the 4th of July at our farm, and watching the kids go wild at the beach, but right now all the pain is a little too fresh. A little too real.

I am very much looking forward to school starting next month and walking all three of our children there in the mornings and big cozy sweaters and warm flannels and Halloween and relaxing jazz music going on in the background at all times of the day and baking and soups and yeah. Do you long for all of that, too?

I say this every year, but I don’t know if I have ever wanted fall to get here as much as I do now. I’m over summer.