Are You More of a Microwave or a Slow Cooker?

The other morning we were at our son’s friend’s birthday party and I was talking to a few of the moms. We were huddled in a corner, me and the two moms, and I told them I don’t think it’s a coincidence that we ended up coming to this party while our husbands stayed home.

After chatting for 20 minutes, we all came to the realization that we’re all more alike than we might have originally thought. All three of us are the ones who usually handle the social functions, while our other half’s would generally prefer to stay back a little. We talked about how, if they would have come to something like a birthday party for an hour, they would need the rest of the day to recharge before they could do anything else. I married an empath, what can I say?

When we came to this realization, one of the sweet moms said she and her husband like to use the analogy of a microwave and a slow cooker. She shared that she is a microwave, always going going going and not giving as much thought to what she’s going to say next, while her husband is much more of a slow cooker in that regard, always thinking before he speaks, taking time to ponder about plans and ideas he has before doing them.

Isn’t that kind of a genius way to put it? Couples and relationships are so very different, just as different as the two people in them, but there are always similarities if you look hard enough, and I found myself really resonating with that analogy. I am definitely a microwave, usually saying the first thing that comes to my mind and flying by the seat of my pants, not thinking too hard before jumping into the next thing. Sometimes I will, admittedly by accident, say three things in a row to PJ before he even has time to answer one. I have a lot of “squirrel moments” that I didn’t even realize I had until he pointed them out to me. It’s just how I’ve always been! Let’s call it one of my “quirks”, shall we?

Meanwhile, PJ thinks about everything he does and says before he does it. He is a planner, and spontaneity isn’t his favorite word in the dictionary. He likes to be prepared for just about everything in life, and it’s something I so admire about him. I honestly wish I could be more like that, but I guess that’s why there’s two of us in this marriage/parenting setup: When one of us lacks something, the other will (hopefully) be there to make up for it.

What about you? I’d love to know: Do you see yourself as more of a microwave or a slow cooker? And why don’t we do more food analogies as ways to describe ourselves? So many questions. Food for thought, if you will!